...rebellious high Christmas spirited people

Alrighty here is my Christmas edition of the Friday Fuck You. No I am not overly fond of the holiday season as it is being called now a days, but I do like looking at christmas lights and I think it would be awesome if some carolers came to my door. But what I can’t stand is getting distracted while I drive by Rudolph, yah you heard me Rudolph the fucking red nose white tail! No he’s not a reindeer cause we don’t have reindeer in Mass if we did we would have ‘reindeer’ crossing sings not ‘deer’ crossing sings. But apparently there are some people who feel the need to be reminded of imaginary flying reindeer all year long so what they do is this….

Yeap they deface public property for the sake of pissing me off, well maybe not exactly that reason but it works that way. No as for the people who do this I can only imagine 2 groups of people… ‘Rebellious’ teens and the elderly. Yeap I can just see it now a bunch of kids hiding in the bushes waiting for all the cars to be gone, red stickers in hand and as soon as the lights are out of sight BAM! They hit that unsuspecting white tail with a big red nose! this just in... if you like reading these please Click the follow link on the right of the page!!!!!!>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Then they all scatter back to their homes completely out of breath and high-fiving and giggling all night about the notorious deed. Or it’s the elderly… yah it’s the elderly doing it they want every one to know that Santa is always watching and to make this boring old deer have some Christmas spirit that will last all the way into the fucking summer, and till next Christmas and the next…. Now if people want to put up their own little cutesy ‘Santa please stop here’ or ‘reindeer crossing’ signs on the front lawn I have no problem with that because it will most likely be coming down before January unlike the damn reindeer crossing signs that I now have to see on every wooded corner. So to all the rebellious high Christmas spirited people who feel the need to put red nose sticker on all the deer crossing signs out there fuck you and your damn reindeer!

lazy, tar laden, chemical burning, unhealthy workers

With my new job at the 99 I work about 6 hours shifts and for the most of this time I don’t get a lot of official breaks unless I go to the bathroom or walk in, and this is okay with me id rather be working than have to sign out and sign back in I'm ok with that, but what I'm not really ok with is smoke breaks. Smokers can duck out and have break for about 5-10 minutes every so often and this is allowed and accepted. Now what I wanna know is why do companies give smokers breaks, this is an addiction to a chemical product! And hear are companies praising it! We are no longer in the days of the Marlboro Man smoking is looked at the same as it used to be its no longer elegant or rough and tough its seen as gross and disgusting. So while the unhealthy smokers get a break to make them self less healthy, the healthy workers such as myself have to continue working!! Now is this because we healthy workers have the stamina to continue working for long hours with out much of a break?? Or is it because all the old big wigs who run the company probably smoke and that’s how it was back in the day and its just a ‘rule’ that has been around for a while so its still in effect even with today’s society frowning on tobacco usage? Personally I think the breaks should go to the healthy individuals, who don’t poison their bodies with cancer causing chemicals, and this is like a said a chemical addiction! Smokers can’t wait until their next haul; usually upon their return from the smoke break they complain that they need another. So I want to know that if I told my job that I was an alcoholic or a cocaine user and that I would like a break during work to get a little bit more into my system and that “its okay I'm not addicted or anything, its just something I like to do” you think they would give me the break??? Doubt it! So my plan is to bring candy cigarettes to work and say that I would like my cigarette break. Hey they never said that they have to be cigarettes filled with tobacco! Mine would just be filled with sugary goodness! And I would get a well deserved break! So to all you lazy, tar laden, chemical burning, unhealthy workers FUCK YOU I WANT MY BREAK!!! So companies stop praising drug usage at the workplace, and give the healthy people the break not smokers!

paranoid angry letter writing people

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As many of you are surely aware that school is back in session, and with this comes school buses and the dreaded school traffic! So im sure that this is a familiar scene to you

Now years ago school bus traffic was too bad unless you were on a long road with out any other routes available. How ever things have changed and now bus traffic is more horrid than ever! When I went to high school and took the bus I had to walk about a mile to my bus stop in the morning and sometimes in the afternoon unless Mary was feeling nice and she would drop me off closer to my house. But now! Every single kid gets pick up right in front of their house! Even if two kids live two houses down from each other still two different fucking bus stops! How are these kids supposed to interact with each other before school and copy homework and tell each other about the readings they were supposed to do with out the noisy bus atmosphere! That’s what the bus stop is for! But no!!! every one is to worried about there kid getting pick up by some freaking stranger or something now a days to let them walk unattended from the stop around the corner to their fucking house. and in turn that make all of us commuters drive with one hand on the wheel and one hand on our heads looking down at the clock on the radio wondering how long this is going to take and complaining every time there is another stop 20 feet from the last one! I can’t take it! These kids have got to grow up, no really these parents have got to grow up and let their kid stand at the corner or in front of their neighbors’ house because I don’t want to have to stop every fucking 20 feet for a whole 3 mile stretch of road! So all you paranoid angry letter writing people who must have complained about the safety of their child on a tiny little side street where every one knows every one, and their kids all have big birthday parties together each year,. FUCK YOU and let them stand together at one fucking stop so I can get to work on time!

REWIND...evil symphonizing crickets from hell

Ive done it before and I'm doing it again! its a fuck you rewind! this posting come from August of 2007. so for some of you it may be new some it might not be, but its happening all over again and i cant stand it! so here it is.

This weeks Friday Fuck You goes out to the reason that I have trouble sleeping at night, Crickets. Yes crickets, those little tiny freaking bugs that love to make noise. Now I love the sounds of crickets when I am camping out in the woods away from every thing and anything. but the crickets I am talking about live in my room, now keep in mind that I live in the basement so I don't find it that strange that they are there. So anyways the sound of crickets is usually a soothing sound that reminds people of the great out doors. But alas not me, you see these crickets are in my room as I have stated. And when they are in my room they then become loud as hell! These little evil bastards with their tiny violins from hell do not stop with their continual music. I stomped out 4 of them last night and still they are there in numbers probably more than I can imagine. When they are playing this symphony of violent decibels they are playing it within the furnace, which only makes it louder! So to all you little evil symphonizing crickets from hell FUCK YOU! And your little violins of fire.

Here's a video to explain it what i have to listen to non stop....



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...all wheel drive lousy excuse for an off road vehicle

Okay so my job is really digging under my skin, I have gone from an environmentalist to a parking attendant, and yah this happens every year but usually not this fast so don’t have to deal with it as long. So now the beach is entirely open and now very one and there fucking brother is coming out to make my life miserable. And the worst of them is the god damn fucking all wheel drive piece of shit cars, instead of the four wheel drive that they should have they have all wheel drive, and the say it with such pride, fuck you. Your little Subaru might be good In the snow with one front wheel and one rear wheel driving you forward but you know what it isn’t gunna do shit for a foot and a half of soft sand. Just face it your little fucking family wagon Subaru, Lexus, and Honda piece of crap cars are not meant to run with the big dogs. You want to come out and drive o the beach get a fucking pick up truck, something with some clearance! I ma tired of pushing your sorry ass out of the sand, first of all its not fun for me when I go to push you out and your spray sand and rocks in my face when you slam on the gas after I just told you to go easy, speed is not going to help you get out. And its always the women, its true guys just have a knowledge about trucks and how to operate a four wheel drive, not to say guys never get stuck but its mostly women. So don’t bring your station wagon on my beach, and don’t honk at me from your car trying to get my attention; I see you, you fucking idiot I'm not looking at you for a reason. Here’s how a four wheel drive works… Step one PUT IT IN NUETRAL BEFORE SHIFTING!!! This way the gears are free to change with out grinding or slipping. Second step GO SLOW I know this is hard for every ones fast track lives, but it will fucking help majorly. Spinning your tires will not help one bit and makes me feel less obligated to help because I can instantly see you have no idea what your doing. It is no where in my job description to help stuck vehicles. So if any more of these fucking low to the ground, all wheel drive lousy excuse for an off road vehicle get stuck FUCK YOU I'm not helping!

...iTunes and any other lame excuse for a product made by Apple

Alrighty so the other day i got a late graduation gift from a family member so i decide to stop by CVS and pick up an iTunes card since Angie had to get minutes for her phone anyways. So i was all excited and went home and started down loading songs. i got a few random ones and the new Kings of Leon Cd and also the new Rise Against CD, Sweet is what you may be thinking right? WRONG! so i downloaded about 30 songs in total, and well they took for ever to download i had to literally restart my computer after every song down loaded or the next one would not start! and at the end of it all i was missing a total of 18 songs! that's more than half of the fucking songs i paid for that i did not receive! so i send an email thing to iTunes asking where my songs were and that i was not happy with the service. so they allowed me to down load the songs again. OK try number two! now most of these songs eventually down loaded, but again i had to restart my fucking computer every time! because god damn iTune would lock up and not complete the downloads! and when i finally get to the end of all those songs i go through the lit one more time to check to see if I'm missing songs still and low and behold yeah I'm still missing two fucking songs!! what the fuck i just cant win!

Yeah so I'm still missing Kotov syndrome - Rise Against and Manhattan - Kings of Leon. so if any one happens to have these songs and would send em the MP3 file so that i can have two complete Cd's that would be awesome, because i don't think that I will ever buy another fucking stupid itunes gift card, fuck that its way to much trouble, Bring back Napster! i though that buying from iTunes was like the best thing you could do because the money goes to the artist or something but you know what i knew it was too good to be true because its a fucking Apple program and Apples fucking suck nuts! So iTunes and any other lame excuse for a product made by Apple FUCK YOU and FUCK YOU Steve Jobs your shit sucks!

...temperature intolerant cashier

OK so first off let m say that I love muffins they are one of my favorite breakfast type foods. so some times on my way to work if I did not eat breakfast at home I will stop at Marylou's and grab a muffin. Now last week I did this and I asked for a blueberry muffin, pretty standard muffin, fairly popular but they didn't have any out they had to get one from out of a new box, ok so I thought this to be strange just a bit cause its a pretty popular muffin, but what ever i got my muffin and went on my merry way.

But this week i went in and ask for my delicious blueberry muffin and again there was not any out! ok so now this seems strange, what kind of muffins do people in Plymouth ask for if not standard blueberry muffins? and then the lady says to me that "its kinda cold do you want me to heat it up for you?" i respond "no that's okay i like them cold" Which i true i like muffins at all temps, nice fresh hot from the oven muffins, room temperature muffins and yes even slightly cold muffins. so i take my muffin and drive to work. upon arrival i open my bag to enjoy my muffin while waiting for the rest of the morning crew to arrive. now as i bite into my muffin i realise something. that not only is it cold... but its fucking frozen! WHAT THE FUCK! a frozen muffin! now ok the lady did say it was cold and i did refuse her offer to heat it up but come on lady there is a fucking difference between "kinda cold" and fucking frozen! i mean there were ice crystal when i bite into it! i could've smashed it on my dash board and it wouldn't have even dented! how can you say that its "kinda cold"!!

So as i sat there waiting for my muffin to defrost i went hungry, thinking about how the lady at Marylou's could've though that any one would enjoy a FROZEN muffin! So to the temperature intolerant cashier at Marylou's in Plymouth FUCK YOU I DON'T WANT A GODDAMN FROZEN MUFFIN!!

...Gates, Obama and other race card playing jack asses

ok welcome every one who is new to this and a big welcome back to old friends. So to start things off i would like to say that this episode has been brewing in me for a few days now, when first heard about this Henry Louis Gates arrest i though wow did that guy over react, butt then last night i heard Obama state that he think it was racial profiling and that the Cambridge police "acted stupidly" and this was after Obama said that he DID NOT know all the facts!! ok so hold the fucking horses. first of all let em sum up the story for those who may not know what I'm talking about....

So the Cambridge police get a call that there is a man trying to break into a house, when they get to the location there is this Henry Louis gates fellow kicking in the door of a house. they ask him for his ID, now that all they did, they didn't go in guns a blazin' screaming and yelling or anything they just asked for his ID and what he was doing. and he turns around and starts yelling at the officers about how "they only want his ID cause hes a black man" no you jack ass! they want your ID cause from what they can see your trying to break into this fucking house! so this type of racial profiling conversation goes on for a few minutes and finally the guys gives the cops his ID, turns out he fucking lives at the house and he forgot his keys. so the cops are now all frustrated and arrest the guys on disorderly conduct, and he was release later that day.

Now all of this could've been avoided if this douche bag just fucking cooperated with the cops from the beginning. but no instead of saying "oh thank you for coming officers i locked my dumb ass out of my own house" he says fuck the police like some sorta fucking rap star! and gets his dumb ass locked up. now one thing that really bothers me about this is that this guy is like a college professor at fucking Harvard! you think he would be smart about the situation. But no he would rather show all of his students that its alright to not cooperate with the law and to place the race card when ever you possibly can cause 'whities always keeping the black man down", fuck you what kind of role model are you! and now this douche bag wants an apology from the cop that arrested him. i say no way this cop taught classes about the dangers of racial profiling, i don't think he was looking to make this dude bite the fucking curb or anything.

And then last night Obama comes on the TV and says that the Cambridge police acted stupidly, after he clearly stated that he didn't know all the facts. well fuck you Obama, you have no place in this situation, this was a local happening that was blown out of proportions cause some dude was having a bad day. what does that say about our president, when he is willing to throw down the race card in defence of this crazy guy, with out knowing all the facts.

if you ask me the ones who need to be apologizing are Gates and Obama! the Cambridge police were doing their jobs and this guy flipped his lid for no reason. So to Henry Louis Gates and to President Obama and to any other race card playing jack asses FUCK YOU move on with your life and suck it up the whole world is not out to get the black man!

...ignorant self loving uneducated bird hating mother fuckers

So since i just posted this on facebook i figured id give you all something new to read. well as most of you know i work on Plymouth Long Beach protecting and monitoring nesting Piping Plovers, Least Terns and Common Terns, as well as any other species that decides to make the beach its home. well i love my job and the difference that i make for these species. so it really freaking irritates me when people just don't fucking give a damn! i get people all the time that say things like "You know they eat them in Mexico!" and "We need a fox out here to get rid of these damn birds" well i get this all the time and it gets old. so first of all the answer to that age old story of piping plovers being eaten in Mexico is completely FALSE! i have been to central America and seen plovers (Mexican banded plovers, not piping plovers) and i asked my guide if the locals ate these birds, to which he laughed and replied "no man, there is no meat on them, rather eat iguana" so there you have it a first hand report cancelling this ugly rumor. These people just need to get off their fat bloated carcases and park their car and walk on the beach instead of just parking there cars on the sand and plopping the cooler and chair right there at the tail pipe. these bird have their babies out there trying to dodge beach goers and other predators they don't need cars driving past them all the time too, and besides its a federal law that protects them so pretty much there is not a damn thing you can do about it!! all these people need is a little bit of education and a space in their heart for some one other than their own selves. so to all of you ignorant self loving uneducated bird hating mother fuckers FUCK YOU!